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Posted by: Maricopa Lawyers on Dec 3, 2013

Tis the season for family togetherness and nostalgia for the past holidays of yesteryear. While friends, family, the people on TV, and strangers seem to embody the spirit of Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and other celebrations–you might be feeling a little, well, grouchy. Surviving the holidays after a divorce is not easy, it may even be painful if you have severed ties, or are still in the process of separation.

Make sure to surround yourself with people who care about you, even if it’s just your children, or some co-workers, don’t be afraid to reach out. Try not to spend your holidays by yourself, since this can cause a downward spiral of negative thinking. If you go to a family gathering, don’t bring the thoughts of your ex with you. Gossiping or bad-mouthing your former spouse can make people feel uncomfortable and annoyed.

If your divorce is still fresh, you might want to avoid, or have as little contact with them as possible during the holidays. This might be a little hard if you have children, but acting like things are the way the used takes a mental toll for everyone, especially the children. If you’ve been separated for a while, it may be easier to go a conjoined holiday, as long as there is no bickering or sadness.

This is an opportunity to create your own traditions, for example: instead of a large Thanksgiving dinner, you can create a nice Italian dinner instead of spending the entire day cooking for 2-3 people. Maybe you can take your children to see the newest release at the movie theater, or volunteer at a soup kitchen to help those in need. You’d be surprised at how fun a creative holiday can be, especially for your little ones.

Remind yourself that it’s okay to still feel the effects from losing a relationship. Be patient and take this holiday season one day at a time.